January 31, 2006

• Your Life Path Number is 5

  Your purpose in life is to life freely and collect experiences. You love life – new adventures, new people, new ideas. You are very curious, and you crave novelty in all forms. You tend to make friends easily, and you enjoy the company of all types of people. In love, you are fun and even a bit intoxicating. But you won’t stick around for long. You are impulsive and spontaneous – which sometimes leads you to do things you regret. Sometimes you can be overindulgent with food, sex, or drugs. You have many talents, so many that you are often scattered and unfocused.

  Aside from the love thing, i would say this is pretty accurate…not bad for a random number generator, wouldnt you say?

  
  Not only did this comic make me laugh, it also brought back a very
  strange memory. My grandfather on my fathers side had donated his body
  to medical science. And knowing what i do now, more power to him for
  that. Anyway, what you may not know is when you donate your body to
  science, they cremate it and return the remains to your next of kin.
  When my family moved from New York to California, the literal day we
  were pulling out of the street, the UPS guy (or whoever) pulls up and
  gives us my grandfathers remains. Well, not knowing what else to do
  with them, we took grandpa’s ashes with us to california, figuring we
  would bury him out there where we could visit him, rather than in New
  York.

  However, what with one thing and another, we never really got around
  to burying him, so for about 15 years after we moved, he kinda sort
  just sat in a filing cabinet in the garage for lack of anywhere else to
  put him. The running joke in the family was that he was filed under “D”
  for dead dad dworetzky, and that if successive deaths in the family got
  cremated, we could have our own family mausoleum in the garage.

  I know, we were a weird family. still are.

  Our neighbor, after hearing this story, would not enter our garage for years. Actually, come to think of it, she still wont.

  Anyway, when my grandmother died, we finally pulled grandpa out of
  the cabinet and buried him and her together. They are currently share
  the plot with my father, who i like to think would appreciate the irony
  in the fact that modern cemetaries are getting so overcrowded, people
  really are stacked together as if they were in a cabinet.

  So that is what i thought of when i read the cartoon you have probably already forgotten i posted at the top of these words

  
  Another good one. I think comics give us the best laugh when we can see
  a bit of ourselves in the characters. I totally empathize with the pig,
  cuz it really feels like I am that oblivious sometimes when it comes to
  the opposite sex. Like there is some magical secret that will instantly
  allow me to date whomever, wherever i want, nevermind personality
  differences and what not. Other times, i definetly take on much more of
  the egotistical slick persona, assuming that hey, what girls wouldnt
  want me? Sadly for humanity, the second, more assholish approach seems
  to be the one that works more often for attracting the opposite sex.
  Girls may want to date nice guys, but its the jerks who they usually
  turn to first.

  Hmm…that last bit makes me sound bitter or as if i am currently
  having issues. I’m not, no worries. just a personal observation i think
  most males out there would agree with.

  I’m not fat, i’m infected!
  Not that this isnt fascinating research, but really, do americans need
  any MORE excuses to be lazy. Maybe we would be all better off if people
  actually took personal responsibility for their appearance and tried to
  live a healthier lifestyle instead of just latching on to the newest
  excuse for their condition.

  News Flash! the government will give you money to research just about ANYTHING!
  Now if we could deny some of these grants and maybe put that money to
  use say, reforming the health care system, then we would be talking. Or
  maybe my wet earwax is just clogging my thought process, and if i had
  asian dry earwax, i could know why anyone cares about this aside from
  the novelty of knowledge.

  -J

  The Josh once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, “Bang!”

  • 1:55 pm
  • 5 Comments