Hello Again, internet.

It’s been quite some time since I checked in here, and even longer since I put up a travel post. So, in brief: I am finally out of my residency and in the midst of a job search. More posts on that when I have something worth reporting. In the meantime, I am going to focus on finishing up the Scotland Posts, and enjoying time with the new ladyfriend. Free of my residency at last, everything is coming up milhouse!

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Years and Years of books and films about Scotland have taught me one thing; namely, no trip to Scotland is complete without a visit to the highlands, for in the end, there can be only one

 

so off Brian and I set for the home of William Wallace and the highlanders, with a brief stop along the way to visit one of the most well known residents of the highlands

Hamish, the Hairy Coo, the most photographed animal in all of Scotland

Friendly. Powerful. Dopey. These are all descriptions that immediately leap to mind at the site of these gentle, goofy beasts

Hamish is a single dad, with his two calves, Hamish Jr and I forget.

A couple veggies are all it takes to get their undivided attention

But we had to bid a fond farewell to Hamish and his fold as we set off for the deep highlands, where along the way we hoped to catch a glimpse of the Hogwarts express coming back from summer break

Sadly, either the express was not running, or the train was not visible to our muggle eyes

The highlands are covered in bogs, peath and heather. They are Magnificent, marvelous…

And incredibly, freaking cold. These mountains create hardy folk, and being a bit of a mountain person myself, I can vouch that you do not want to mess with anyone who grew up in these hills

On rainy days, this river turns into a raging torrent that weeps for the slaughter carried out on the highlanders by the british king Longshanks

however, even the greatest sorrow must eventually heal, and even the worst weather will pass

and without rain, there would be no rainbows

As the fog lifted briefly, we journey deeper into the highlands and deeper into mystery, to begin our search for one of the most infamous lost legends still around

The waters of the local lochs began to darken, obscuring what may lie beneath. This region is no place to go unprotected

so we paid homage to the fighting men of the green berets

They trained in the highlands, some of the harshest conditions imaginable to survive in

hope and blessings restored we continued on to the little town of Ness

locks at the loch enable ferries, and perhaps other things to travel uphill and upriver

The sun briefly came out, but the fog quickly rolled back in. A mysterious and enchanted place this was

The townsfolk pay tribute to their patron

The black waters of Loch Ness are 21.8 square miles across and 230m (755 ft) deep, deeper than the height of London’s BT tower

It contains more fresh water than all the lakes in England and Wales combined and the low visibility of the water is due to the high peat content

seriously. freezing.

Scanning every inch from bow to stern, looking deep within the murkey waters, our eyes strained for a glimpse of the fabled monster

 

The earliest report of a monster associated with the vicinity of Loch Ness appears in the Life of St. Columba by Adomnán, written in the 7th century.According to Adomnán, writing about a century after the events he described, the Irish monk Saint Columba was staying in the land of the Picts with his companions when he came across the locals burying a man by the River Ness. They explained that the man had been swimming the river when he was attacked by a “water beast” that had mauled him and dragged him under. They tried to rescue him in a boat, but were able only to drag up his corpse. Hearing this, Columba stunned the Picts by sending his follower Luigne moccu Min to swim across the river. The beast came after him, but Columba made the sign of the cross and commanded: “Go no further. Do not touch the man. Go back at once

A brief glimpse of the monster confirmed its existence, and though we gave chase, it slipped away in the storm. So Brian and I had no choice but to turn back, wondering if any would believe our tale. It mattered not however; we knew the truth. So we climbed back on our bus and returned to Edinburgh from the highlands

and watched as the sun set on another adventure filled day.

Day one in Scotland, and Brian and I decided to start the morning off with a wee dram of whisky.

Then we took a look at the volcano we were planning to climb, and had another. 

Okay, we definitely had about 4-5 drams of whisky before beginning our hike, but hey, vacation, right?

Situated right in the center of Edinburgh, the views offered throughout the hike were amazing

The climb kept getting steeper and more gravelly, but finally the end was in site

Graceful as always, I levitated my way down

Fee fi fo fum

A entire city surrounding an extinct volcano, and more nature and countryside surrouning that. The city is like an urban donut!

At last! On top of Arthur’s Seat

Love Rocks

So you know I wuz here

Watch for those falling rocks on the way back!

An exploration of Edinburgh proper next post

Quite a long break in between posts (oh no you moan, as you realize there is another metaphysical intro coming…) NaNoWriMo is almost here and the goal is to finish all the trip postings by then and just write every day for a month to get back into the swing of things. To start commenting back and participating in this community again. Partially because I miss all y’all and partially because I dont have a lot else going on for me IRL right now. But on to the last of the Irish posts…

On A last minute whim (see! I CAN be spontaneous) Brian and I booked a tour to go out and visit Newgrange, one of the oldest known dwellings known to man, a stone age construct predating the pyramids

The majority of the tomb has been reconstructed, but the duel entryway you see is original, as is the large rocks with glyphs and whirls in the front

As large as this thing is around the outside, once you enter it is roughly the size of a broom closet

It is unclear what the newgrange tomb was intended for, but we know it had something to do with the solstice as twice a year a single ray of light shines through the upper entrance and reached the back of the tomb

The prevailing theory is that all these whorls and spirals were drug induced. Cheers to the human drive, getting effed up on whatever is available

Another abandoned hut, but not quite stone age, Brian and I discovered while wandering where we werent supposed to. As usual =)

Hello Hobbittesses

Oh look we have found the shire in Ireland

Hidden throughout these rolling fields are other remains of stone age societies and tombs

The narrow winding walk to the center of the tomb

Next stop was the Hill of Tara, seat of Irelands high kings

Although the scenery is lovely, the was not worth paying to take a tour for. Ireland is filled with equally stunning scenery wherever you turn

It is said from the top of the high seat, you can see 30 of the 36 counties in Ireland

I only count 25 COWnties though. get it? haha I kill me

Ewe know what I mean

As it turns out, boy sheep are spray painted blue, girl pink, and all of them run away when you come toward them. Sheep are nervous creatures outside of petting zoos

I tried so hard to catch a sheep and boy, do I make a terrible sheperd. At least I had more fun running around like a maniac and rolling down the hill again though

And handily located nearby were these celtic crosses!

Well, this concludes the Ireland portion of our tour. Later that night, Brian and I hopped on a plane and crossed the water to arrive in Scotland, where we will continue our tour, but now with more scotch!

Just in time for Halloween, we bring you our own tale of horror and madness.

Brian and I are fans of being frightened, psyched in the supernatural, titillated by the terrifying. And thus, upon learning that Ireland and Scotland are some of the most haunted countries in all of Europe, booked us up a number of ghost tours. There was the ghostdigger bus our first night in DUblin, with brief stops at kilmainham gaol, and gravediggers pub. Then there was a haunted walking tour.

Brian and I wanted to visit the Ireland location of the Hellfire club (of X-men fame for you nerds out there), a hunting lodge of high society hooligans who would perpetrate terrible dark crimes against the populace far from the watching eyes of the city. Yet the tour guides canceled the planned outing, due to a lack of interest and numbers (the two of us being the only parties). As a sop, they offered a free haunted walking tour of the city which, while equally fascinating and recommended, was not what we wanted.

Using my newly accquired gift of gab from the Blarney stone outing, I convinced the tour company to allow us to do the tour if we could find at least two more people to make it worth the companies time to run this tour. And so, armed with only our wits, charm, and a touch of chloroform, my brother and I set out to find two companions to talk nto a horror tour on the outskirts of town. 

…And we actually did it! We found two interesting girls who had never heard of this tour but wanted to check it out. So we contacted the company and made the arrangements. Only to learn the next day, the private tour arranged for us was conditional on us still havng a rental car, as no transportation was available from the company on short notice. 

We then managed to convince a taxi to hire himself privately for the night, the girls to help offset the extra cost, and the tour guide to take us all up. In summary, Brian and I managed to use our Blarney stone blessing to defeat obstacles at every step of the way and make this haunted tour happen. That, my friends, is the power of positive thinking.

And after all that, there it is. The Hellfire club

Originally there was a cairn with a prehistoric passage grave on the summit. Stones from the cairn were taken and used in the construction of Mount Pelier lodge. Shortly after completion, a storm blew the roof off. Local superstition attributed this incident to the work of the Devil, a punishment for interfering with the cairn. Since this time, Montpelier Hill has become associated with numerous paranormal events.

This reputation was further enhanced when members of the Irish Hell Fire Club, which was active in the years 1735 to 1741, began using Mount Pelier lodge as a meeting place. Numerous lurid stories of wild behaviour and debauchery as well as occult practices and demonic manifestations have become part of the local folklore. The original name of the lodge has been displaced and the building is generally known as the Hell Fire Club. When the lodge was damaged by fire, the members of the Hell Fire Club relocated down the hill to the nearby Stewards House for a brief period. This building also has a reputation for being haunted, most notably by a massive black cat

This is the sacrificial stone, upon which on several previous occasions have been found various dead animals and assorted animal parts. No such happenings on this evenings however

…Somebody always draws a dick

While exploring the house, we heard a mysterious voice coming from another part of the lodge, inviting our group to come check out something neat. Heading upstairs, we encountered a young man claiming to be a psychic, attuned to the various multitude of spirits living inside the house. He brought out his amethyst, summoned up a local ghost and we began to play a very creepy game of 20 questions

We made contact with one of the local serving women who had been murdered in the house by fire. Speaking with her made the room icy, the air oppresive, and the psychic overwhelmed. He had to step away, and into another room where we came into contact with a much more malicious spirit.

With full night setting in, our psychic on edge, and the mood getting creepier by the moment, we decided to take our leave of the house and its hauntings before something more powerful than a crystal shaking poltergeist could manifest

But did we catch any orbs in the corner? lurking ghosts watching their prey escape?

Old cigarettes, or human remains…?

As we slowly walked away from the house on silent hill, we could feel our spirits growing lighter. Though we hadnt seen any objective evidence of the undead, we had clearly felt something amiss at the house on haunted hill, and we retired to the oldest pub in dublin, the Brazen Head, to talk through the experiences we had had along the way

Incidentally, if you are ever in Dublin and looking for a scare, check out http://www.hiddendublinwalks.com/hellfire-club-gallery.php hidden dublin walks. They offer about 5 or 6 haunted tours, all of which we went on, all of which are excellent, and the staff bent over backwards to help us get the most out of the experience.

Happy Hauntings!

-J

Having gained the gift of gab and gazed upon the gardens, Brian and I hopped back into our rental car and set off in yet another compass direction, deep into county fermanagh (say that as ethnically as you can) to head to the Marble Arch Caves, one of the worlds 5 geoparks

This place was in the middle of nowhere, took 3 hours to drive round trip and was 100% totally worth it for road trip time with my brother. 

So apparently a geopark, as designated by wikipedia is A territory encompassing one or more sites of scientific importance, not only for geological reasons but also by virtue of its archaeological, ecological or cultural value.…and the marble arch caves were the first such geopark in Europe

That is roughly our tour through the caves. You will note the spelunkers in a boat. splunking. speleology is fun.

Yes, Brian and I drove 1.5 hours into backwoods ireland so we could take a boat ride in a cave. Thats the kind of guys we are, and if you are shaking your head in dismay, you are clearly new to this site

The Marble arch caves are made up primarily of sandstone and limestone

I do heart me some nature time

Ooh! an entrance to the batcave, perhaps?

gratuitous celtic cross

Cave dock

The Porridge Pot formation, because it looks like…well, a lump of rock to me, but I guess if you are irish, you have some disappointing breakfast foods

This was one of my favorite formations. Its totally a little cave house on the river. Nature, you are one fine bitch

Getting photos with minimal cave lighting, not easy. Thanks for all those flashes, german tourist group!

So Brian and I enjoyed our boat ride/hike through the caves, but sadly, I have no facts for you about them, because the only availble tour group for us to join was entirely in german. Which is not a good cave language. There are lots of angry echoes. That said, we had a fantastic time despite the language barrier and spent most of the tour mentally redecorating our superhero lair. 

We are rapidly approaching the end of the Ireland part of the tour, but there are some great ghost stories and sights coming up, just in time for Halloween. I should hopefully finish documenting this 2 week trip within this month, and can get back to more regular posting in time for NaNoWriMo

Happy trails!

Having explored Blarney Castle, we continued to wander around the surrounding grounds, the groves of Blarney, and the druid/faery garden

One day, all this will be yours

The Faery Garden seemed innocent enough at first

But a single unexpected misstep and everything changed

I couldnt leave Brian abandoned to the witch’s tender mercies…

Mr P stayed behind to keep watch

The Witch’s staircase supposedly has the power to grant you any wish as long as you can go up and down it once with your eyes closed. Oh yeah, slippery rock steps, totally sounds like a great idea!

Potato Sacrifice!

We finally found the blarney witch and asked her to kindly transport us back to the real world

After Trips to the distant ends of Ireland, Brian and I decided to take a day in Dublin to enjoy the simple pleasures

A Brieft stop in Michans Church, containt an organ on which Handel is said to have composed his Messiah

Oh yeah, and Bog Mummies. See, the limestone caverns that make up the catacombs of this church keep the air nice and dry, all the better to preserve those interred. Of the four coffins you see the one furthest back against the wall is believed to be a crusader based on how he was buried, with his legs crossed like one crucified

The cryptkeeper has exactly the sort of dark macabre humor one would expect from his position, and offered us an opportunity. For years, it has been said that to shake the hand of the crusader will bring good fortune. So moving aside the gate separating the living and the dead, Brian and I passed briefly into another world, and shook hands with an 800 year old corpse, to see how our luck may change

Then it was off to jail! Kilmainham Gaol to be precise, one of the new reform jails meant to rehabilitate prisoners with light and space

Okay, well, um, more light and space than previous

A number of political prisoners during Irelands early fight for Independence lived and died here, often over a very short time span

Hidden Mickey!

Seems so empty now

Only a few still remain.

But on to somethng happier. Having been to church and prison, it was time to lighten up

A friendly leprechaun pointed the way…

To the Original 900 year lease signed by Arthur Guiness, maker of Irelands National drink!

Hops

Water

And a secret recipe to make the most famous stout beer in the world

Look! It’s the backside of water! beer water!

Guiness is one of the few beers where the bubbles go down!

It is best experienced with all your senses

ANd trust me, it tastes worlds better at the source than anywhere else in the world. I would go so far as to say outside of ireland, guiness is barely even drinkable.

We also learned about the lost art of coopering, or barrel making.

A giant sculpted glass of stout

Then it was off to the rooftop bar to enjoy the perfect pour

So creamy, the bartender could draw a shamrock in our beer!

Mr P decided as Ireland’s national mascot, he had a right to try the national drink

Apparently he was a little mashed

Poor spud

Nothing a nap wont help

Well, church beer and jail, where to next?

Well okay, if you are going to twist my arm

Irish whisky is triple distilled, unlike scotch which is double distilled, and american which is only single distilled. They all have their own unique flavors

The older the whisky, the more color and flavor it takes on from the barrel, and the more evaporates, making the “angels share”

Another tasting

And my qualifactions

Admittedly, we may have been a little drunk that day. But no harm done. And as drinking makes you garrulous this would be perfect preparation for the following days trip to County Cork!

Having explored the northernmost section of Ireland, Brian and I returned to Dublin, had a pint, and the following day set out to explore another direction of the Emerald Isle. This time, we crossed the Cork and Kerry Mountains, setting our sights on Limerick, Galway and the cliffs of Moher

 

There once were two brothers so charming

who traveled places quite alarming…

Their pictures and tales…

describe their travails…

You’ll find them to be quite disarming!

This castle was built for the sole purpose of impressing the ladies. No really! Google that shit!

If this looks vaguely familiar to you at all

Thats because these are the Cliffs of Insanity scaled by the man in black in The Princess Bride

 

Well after much ado about nothing, the waste of time known as clinical skills course is over, i am officially moved downtown (in lincoln park, w00t) and i begin doctoring, albeit as the lowest monkey on the totem pole, on monday. Given all that, i figured i should try and pump out a couple of spain posts before i begin work and have to neglect xanga for who knows how long

So let me begin…

Just so you all know, spain is closed on weekends. Yes, spain, as in the ENTIRE FREAKING COUNTRY. Thankfully i had purchased tickets to a bullfight for the first night we arrived, since all tourist attractions, shops, and the majority of restaurants were closed until monday. This was not a national holiday, just business as usual

however I did see some nice knockers like this one

Nice…one sexual pun and its only the first post. still got it

Here is the Palacio Real, aka the royal palace (closed)

Don Quixote and Sancho Panza, one of my favorite old time classics, and apparently one of Espanas favorites as well

As we kept wandering we came across a sign that appeared to read, Museum of Ham. Whatever in the world could be inside?

Spaniards <3 their meat

Brian also loves spanish meat. wall to wall meat.

Another shot of the closed for business royal palace

And the walkway to the puerta del sol, a huge gathering place filled with shops and restaurants. Very european, and very closed. However, since we were in madrid for 3 days, we did finally make it out to look in some of the shops, so dont fret

Our hotel did not allow flappers, or smoking of fancy cigarettes….we never did figure out which

One of the few things that was open was the famous Prado museum, with an entire room devoted to Goya, one of my favorite artists (along with MC Escher and Salvador Dali) so we walked through that and took a gander….sadly no photos inside the museum, so you cannot appreciate the art along with me

If anyone saw the movie Eurotrip, you will understand why I took this picture, and why my mother prevented me from doing any more than taking a photo…if not, go rent the movie!

The Plaza Mayor is know for being the site of the many trials of the Spanish Inquistion

I have no idea who that man is, but perhaps he was an inquistor…

Why is there a chicago hot dog place in spain???

The lovely and relaxing Retiro Park

With Accompanying Crystal Palace (dont be fooled, it is really glass, but glass palace doesnt sound quite as regal)

The Triunfo in Madrid

The Puerta Del Sol in the evening

Next Post…bullfighting!

-J

And off I go to thailand…thanks for the well wishes all!

Bangkok, Oriental setting
And the city don’t know that the city is getting
The creme de la creme of the chess world in a
Show with everything but Yul Brynner

Time flies — doesn’t seem a minute
Since the Tirolean spa had the chess boys in it
All change — don’t you know that when you
Play at this level there’s no ordinary venue

It’s Iceland — or the Philippines — or Hastings — or –
or this place!

[COMPANY]
One night in Bangkok and the world’s your oyster
The bars are temples but the pearls ain’t free
You’ll find a god in every golden cloister
And if you’re lucky then the god’s a she
I can feel an angel sliding up to me

[THE AMERICAN]
One town’s very like another
When your head’s down over your pieces, brother

[COMPANY]
It’s a drag, it’s a bore, it’s really such a pity
To be looking at the board, not looking at the city

[THE AMERICAN]
Whaddya mean? Ya seen one crowded, polluted, stinking town –

[COMPANY]
Tea, girls, warm, sweet
Some are set up in the Somerset Maugham suite

[THE AMERICAN]
Get Thai’d! You’re talking to a tourist
Whose every move’s among the purest
I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine

[COMPANY]
One night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble
Not much between despair and ecstasy
One night in Bangkok and the tough guys tumble
Can’t be too careful with your company
I can feel the devil walking next to me

[THE AMERICAN]
Siam’s gonna be the witness
To the ultimate test of cerebral fitness
This grips me more than would a
Muddy old river or reclining Buddha

And thank God I’m only watching the game — controlling it –

I don’t see you guys rating
The kind of mate I’m contemplating
I’d let you watch, I would invite you
But the queens we use would not excite you

So you better go back to your bars, your temples, your massage
parlours –

[COMPANY]
One night in Bangkok and the world’s your oyster
The bars are temples but the pearls ain’t free
You’ll find a god in every golden cloister
A little flesh, a little history
I can feel an angel sliding up to me

One night in Bangkok makes a hard man humble
Not much between despair and ecstasy
One night in Bangkok and the tough guys tumble
Can’t be too careful with your company
I can feel the devil walking next to me

And because i shant be around for valentine’s day,

-J