June 1, 2006

• The last stand for mutants and zombie hunger pangs

  g0poppy: actually he has much respect for a person who has a zombie contingency plan like he does
  coffeeweasel: he and i actually need to discuss this
  coffeeweasel: i have been wondering what exactly happens to zombies if they dont get brains
  coffeeweasel: nothing negative, based on the movies
  coffeeweasel: they just get cranky until they DO get brains
  coffeeweasel: except 28 days. then they die of hungy
  g0poppy: yeah or else they stop being zombies after a looong while
  coffeeweasel: ooh…really?  hmmm…that might call for a new zombie contingency plan

  So to briefly expand upon my zombie thoughts from the other day, i just
  realized that we dont really know what happens to zombies who don’t get
  brains.

  Think about it…all these zombie movies, people are running terrified,
  b/c if you are bitten, you get infected, become a zombie and then go
  questing for the flesh of others, yada yada yada we all know the drill

  but only one movie (28 days) has any sort of negative effect for the
  zombies…they starve to death. Every other movie (dead alive, evil
  dead, resident evil, night of the living dead, dawn of the dead,
  zombies ate my neighbors, etc) if the zombies can’t get brains, they
  basically…erm…wait until they can get more brains? they get cranky?
  WE DON’T KNOW!

  your thoughts?

  in the meantime…some more ADVENTURES IN AIM!

  coffeeweasel: dude, you want to meet someone based on his bong size? that cant be right
  xxxxx: well, they guy has a 6 footer
  coffeeweasel: so size matters that much to you huh?
  xxxxxx: i just bet it would be crazy to take a hit off of
  coffeeweasel: i can imagine that convo…excuse me, you dont know me,
  but sometimes i look through your window at night and i couldnt help
  but notice that you have a huge piece i would love to get my mouth
  around…
  xxxxxx: i hate you

  TaoTeDrew: shall i call you on the phone of triumph tomorrow?
  coffeeweasel: better than the phone of sorrow
  TaoTeDrew: yes, i do not like that phhone… in fact… why did we even get that phone?
  coffeeweasel: name sounded cool
  TaoTeDrew: true enough

  I went to Whole Foods the other day (or as my bro calls it, the hippie
  mart) and purchased some soy yogurt and soy cheese. It is touch being
  evolved beyond the need for milk…now i know how the xmen feel.

  And speaking of the newest xmen movie *WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD*

  here is my opinion: if you can ignore the fact that the story is
  terrible horrible and no good, and that brett ratner as a director
  sucks at life, the rest of the film is quite enjoyable.
  I cheered when cyclops died. No one grew up reading the comics and liking cyclops. The man was a bitch. whipped and a pansy.

  Other thoughts i had upon watching xmen 3:

  1) angel was totally uneccesary to this movie. All they needed was the
  name worthington. Angel did nothing except jump out of a window and
  save his father. He didn’t even fight with the xmen. lame.

  2) why did logan have to kill jean? Here’s a though…why not stick her
  with the mutant cure? or send the mutant nullifying little kid up to
  meet her?

  3) Where the hell was nightcrawler? he could have popped in, knocked jean on the head, popped out. problem solved

  4)for that matter, when did wolverine become invincible? i like him as
  much as the next guy, but mutant healing does not cover pieces of your
  skin flaking off and immediately growing back

  5) beast being a diplomat is good. but it didnt take him that long to
  decide to become a warrior again. One minute he says…churchill blah
  blah blah…next second…sorry mr pres, i have to retire to rip out
  people’s throats

  6) the all encompassing climatic battle consisted of 6 xmen versus the
  100 or so mutants that magneto could muster? and they WIN? wtf? These
  people are not that powerful…the whole point is that xmen and
  brotherhood are evenly matched

  7) rogue would not have given up her powers…this was covered in both
  the comics and the animated series in an episode that features angel
  and a supposed *cure* for the mutant gene. An episode, which, if ratner
  had watched, he could have expanded into a much better story than he
  came up with

  8) Professor X in this movie was so out of character ethically it was
  ridicoulous and i could not get past it. He would not limit another for
  safety w/o their permission, he would not take over the body of a
  comatose patient, he would not up and decide scott is unfit to lead the
  xmen (really…scott has always been a little bitch, but prof x loves
  him)

  9) I’m the juggernaut bitch. One of the few things that they did right.
  Way to pay attention to your audience. For those of you not in on the
  joke, click here and see the real reason the whole theater was laughing

  -J
  

  • 12:27 am
  • 1 Comment