September 1, 2006

  • Badass means never having to show gratitude

    I just learned the other day that the Mongols used to drink their horses' blood when there was no food to be plundered. As in:

    Mongol raider: hmm, tough day of looting and pillaging today guys, and the damn chinese still have that wall up, so we can't get takeout -looks like we are going to have to eat our transportation.Hey horse, stand still a minute

    Horse: *sigh*

    That's pretty badass...and also much harder to do with a civic. Although I suppose siphoning gas might come close, if i used said gas to go to the grocery store

    I mean, talk about oppression, this is ACTUALLY drinking the blood of the workers. Cart around some guy all day and then he goes vampire on your ass! The nerve!

    Now I want to write a Marxist short story about vampire factory owners. But not as a metaphor...factory owners actually drinking their blood. Until van helsing forms the very first proletariat union.

    This post has been brought to you by my desire not to study

    -J

    I'm still here