April 19, 2008

• Why is this night different from all other nights?

  Now, Pesach, or
  Passover, is the holiday via which we celebrate the Exodus of the Jews
  from bondage in Egypt
  which by the way comes only a week before greek easter!

  Here is my friend Kimmy’s interpretation of Passover, which is hilarious

  and here is mine:

  GOD: The Egypt is everywhere. It is
  all around us. Even now, in this very desert. You can see it when you
  look out your hut’s door or when you go to the market. You can feel it
  when you build a pyramid … when you don’t go to the temple of Ra …
  when you don’t get paid for your labors.

  Moses: What truth?

  GOD:
  That you are a slave, Moses. Like everyone else you were born into
  bondage. Into a prison of sand that gets into your sandals and your
  robe and your underwear. A prison for your people.

  Then Moses learned how to fly and had crazy martial arts fights with Pharoah Smith. That’s totally how it happened.

  For those of
  you unfamiliar with Passover, the operative element of the holiday is
  that Jews spend eight days not eating any food with yeast in it. That may
  not sound like a lot, but yeast is in everything. For starters,
  that whole bottom level of the Food Pyramid (hah!) is gone. See what happens when Jews leave? PYRAMIDS COLLAPSE!

  • 1:05 pm
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