April 6, 2012

• Indiana Josh and The Temples of DOOM

  

  Greetings All!

  Indiana Josh and his trusty sidekick Short Round, accompanied by longtime fellow adventurers Dr Han and Miss Crystal recently returned from their yearly trip exploring yet another continent. This year, our intrepid band of thrill-seekers decided to explore the exotic experiences of Northern India, and search the mysterious heights, and brave the worst lows of bordering Nepal. Stuffed with the usual Danger, Despair and Deeds of Derring-Do, the following journal entries and their accompanying photos will hopefully make you laugh, cry, and keep you at the edge of your seat while you read the latest epic

   

  INDIANA JOSH AND THE TEMPLES OF DOOM

  

  Day 1: 16 Mar 2012

  Have Just arrived in India, another third world bastion of developing culture, industry, and yes, aromas.

  

  The Crowds are palpable, a post apocalyptic throng of poverty stricken zombies searching for change instead of brains. Brains they have aplenty, as they must to survive from day to day, but not a street goes by but is populated by working stiffs in one form or another

  

  First order of business then, is to find some means of conveyance to get to our hotel. We learn quickly that there are three rules to good driving in India

  

  1. Good Breaks
  2. Good Horn
  3. Good Luck

  Suddenly, New York Cabbies make a lot more sense as we are whisked away in what can only be described by Dr Han as “like playing a video game for two hours with MY LIFE”. Traffic moves at a steady 30km per hour, but it does so by whisking in and out of lanes that clearly exist only in the minds of the drivers as any extraneous material such as painted road lines, traffic signals, and pedestrians are simply ignored.

   

  One moment our cab is driving down the left side of the road (thanks a lot Britain!) only for the cabby to decide he doesnt like his current position so he abruptly honks his horn to let other drivers around him know he is about to attempt manslaughter of his fares, then cuts across 4 lanes of traffic (in a 2 lane road no less), driving briefly against the flow of traffic toward several oncoming cars, only to duck back in to a lane somewhere in an intersection, all while sipping his chai and answering a text. Everyone hear drives like this, and after the initial terror, the car rides become a blur

  

  By the end of the trip, we all agree that No racing game or driving simulator in the world will ever match up, and the previously loved Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland is now less thrilling than a trip to the Mall.

  After settling in at our hotel, The Shangri La, an undiscovered paradise indeed, we briefly search the surroundings for some type of sustenance

  

  Knowing the dangers of getting the dreaded Delhi Belly from street vendors, Indiana Josh gets in touch with local contacts, their information obtained from an associate stateside

  

  The modern, ultra hip decor of the punjabi restaurant belies its humble surroundings, and a delicious meal is had with new friends

  

  From Left: Miss Crystal, Dr Han, Indiana Josh, Mansi, Pavan, and Siddharth

  Bellies full, we return to our hotel to await the fourth member of the party set to arrive tomorrow, when the adventure will truly begin

   
  

  Welcome, my friends, to India.

   

  TO BE CONTINUED…

   

  • 3:14 am
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