January 1, 2010

• Happy 2010!

  First and Foremost, Happy New Year to everyone.

  Before I begin my yearly review, let me welcome you into the new year with my favorite toast

  May the best you’ve ever seen Be the worst you’ll ever see; May friends never leave your homestead Wi’ a teardrop in their e’e. May you all keep hale and hearty Till ye’re old enough to dee, May you all be just as happy As I wish you all to be

  And now, my yearly tradition, even as my regular blogging has fallen somewhat by the wayside

  PART THE FIRST

  Go to the first entry of each month for the last year
  copy and paste the first and last sentence of each of those entries

  January
  Once again for kicks and giggles, I am enrolled in a medical ethics course…as such, I am obliged to read up on the principles and post discussions in response to current event…
  …lets see how we do, shall we?

  February
  I am back in Chicago after a 2 month absence. Nothing has changed, and yet everything is different…
  … So in my remaining time here, I will endeavor to revisit a few old haunts, and explore as many nooks and crannies as I can before it is once again time to day goodbye.

  March
  Ah, the beginning of the end as Istarted my last rotation as a med student ever today, Child Psychiatry…
  …Also, if you have ever wanted to hear Barack Obama say the words “ignorant motherfuckers” you need to go here, right now Barack Obama Cursing

  April
  I have been back home for less than a week, and already I am beginning to remember why it was so nice to be 3000 miles away with a place of my own…
  …I hope I can pay off enough of my debt to move out sooner rather than later. It’s a lot easier to get along with my family when I have somewhere I can escape to if I need it

  May
  Hey folks, while I prepare for my trip (first one to give me a cool nickname like Indiana Jones wins a prize!) Here is some information about the swine flu…
  …My grandfather always told me we would see a black president when pigs fly…and 100 days into office for Barack Obama…swine flu

  June
  Thanks for all the birthday wishes, I spent my special day touring the pyramids, pretending to be indiana jones/brendan fraser in the mummy, and getting drunk on the train to Aswan…all in all, a rousing success….
  …ncidentally, I think my stomach has more jetlag than my sleeping time, as I have been getting hungry at odd hours

  July
  Leaving Egypt behind, I had to cross not a desert, but a sea, to reach Jordan…
  …nd I wasnt going to be the one to find it. I had enough on my plate, and my trail was leading me ever closer to the holy grail. I could tell I was close, for the next stop on the tour would be the Red Rose City

  August
  Okay, well not really. More like 2 weeks of night, followed by 2 weeks of day and then back to the reverse. But you will have to forgive me a little drama as I prepare to embark upon the REAL beginning of my residency…
  …Join me at around 3-4am for the next several weeks, and we will find out what those are together.

  September
  I just pronounced my first patient.Specifically, I pronounced him dead. shuffled off this mortal coil. An ex-human, as it were…
  …After all, I still had another 10 pages to return, and the night was just beginning..

  October
  An orca fat patient (BMI 40) came in for diabetes and sleep apnea…
  …the child screams “no, not in the butt!!” the father replies ” yeah, you and your mother both”

  November
  The numbers on the clock read 3:30. 30 minutes until I am protected from admissions, 90 minutes until I get to go home…
  …Next time, I will be much less hesitant and once again, I will go for the throat!

  December
  Currently I am rotating in the coronary/cardiac care unit, or ccu. I dont like it…
  …Oh well. Happy Holidays.

  And with that my new years resolution is to improve myself in every conceivable way

  what’s yours?

  • 1:02 am
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